My rules for following the etiquette of blogging and social media

The explosion of social media and the internet during my lifetime means that unlike our parents, the online generation have been exposed to a whole new world of social politics through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and various other apps and sites. It’s actually crazy to think that in my lifetime, things have developed from that huge box computer in my dining room, which was ridiculously slow and blocked the phone line, to a world of laptops, iPads and smart phones. But it has happened, and with it has come a whole new social etiquette that can make or break friendships and career opportunities – as us bloggers know only too well.

Now there is the complicated web of retaining boundaries by separating personal accounts from professional, through dividing friends across Facebook and Twitter depending on your relationship, and even having a system for following people back. It’s just crazy that this is something we even have to think about – but I’ve noticed as my blog has grown over the last seven months that I have had to think more and more about these types of things, and I’m sure that many others have felt the same. So, after a lot of thought, I have come to a few conclusions over blogging social etiquette that I think might help out other bloggers who might have found themselves in a similar position.

I’ve noticed that as my blog and social media sites grow with more followers, readers and comments daily, that while most of them are people interested in my writing and reading what I am putting out into the world, there are also a small proportion who are just interested in gaining more followers. This to me is just sad. I absolutely love when I get new followers because they have seen a post of mine or they have engaged in discussion of a topic with me. I love meeting other bloggers through the FBL and Lbloggers chats because we all engage with each other and talk about topics we share interests in. So when people just follow to ask for a follow back, or they follow you and if you haven’t returned the favour within 24 hours they unfollow you – I just find this a) incredibly rude and b) just plain ridiculous. I just don’t understand what these people think they are gaining by having high numbers of followers or “friends” who are not interested in what they have to say or are posting.

Ironically, I received this email this morning..

I am lucky to have so many Facebook friends and Twitter followers because I have so many who do interacts with me on a daily basis both about day-to-day life and about my blog posts. I value my readers and appreciate their comments and feedback – so I just can’t understand why some would rather have faceless and nameless masses of followers who never speak up or give you any feedback.

So, I have made myself some new rules that I thought might also help my fellow bloggers:

 

1. I will no longer be following back those who ask me to follow them, but if you ask me to check out your blog I will happily do so and if I like what I read I will return the favour, as I do often.
2. If you comment or message me asking me to follow you so that you will follow me – it is an instant no-no because what is the point in that?
3. If you follow me on Twitter, I will check out your Twitter and any blogs – if I like what you post and have to say, I will return the favour but only then. I love my newsfeeds on all of these sites because they show up the topics and information that I find interesting and inspiring. I refuse for them to be clogged up with spam and rubbish instead.
4. I will continue – as I have always done – to leave three lovely comments on other bloggers’ sites every day. This is something I have done from the beginning because I think it encourages us to be more of a community and I love to give positive feedback to great posts. I expect nothing in return – just to have put a smile on someone’s face.
5. I will very rarely become Facebook friends with those I meet through blogging or work – this is because I have a Facebook page for my blog and would prefer to use that. But also, because my personal Facebook page is for close friends, school friends and family. I will on occasion break this rule if I have become close friends with other bloggers – but this just helps me retain a little privacy.

I hope this hasn’t come across negatively, but I think that when we are all as busy as we are, not all of us have time to sift through the genuine followers and friends as well as the true ones. I would much rather spend my time talking to those who are genuinely interested in reading what I have to say and discussing it instead of those who just want to up their digits. I have a wonderful core following of readers and I appreciate every comment you leave, every tweet you send and every Facebook like. It is what keeps me writing these posts and excitedly waiting for feedback – everything you guys have to say is what fuels my mind and my hands to want to type the next piece. Thanks for all your feedback guys and I hope this post will help my fellow bloggers in making their own set of rules for dealing with the follow-back demands.

What other social media and blogging advice would you give? Comment below and you could be helping other bloggers.

Stephen Sutton’s story is a tribute to the power of social media

Unless you live under a rock, you will have heard the devastating news that the hugely inspiring Stephen Sutton passed away in his sleep yesterday. I still can’t believe the cruelty of a world where someone as pure and good as Stephen could be taken so harshly from his family, friends and from the rest of the world, but remain happy for him that he had achieved so much and could go having made such a difference to the world around him. Although incredibly impressive, I actually believe the fundraising £3.6million for the Teenage Cancer Trust is the lesser part of what he did for our society. Of course that money will save lives and will go towards creating a legacy in his name, but isn’t it so much more important that through the power of social media he managed to inspired a nation?

So many people were touched by his story, a quick scroll down Facebook or Twitter will see countless messages saying how amazing he was and what a loss it is to society. Importantly, not just those in full health were touched and inspired by him, Stephen also became an icon, a shining example, for those who are suffering from cancer, whether terminal or those in treatment. He showed them that cancer is not the end and that there is so much they can do from a hospital bed with the power of positive thinking. Having known a lot of cancer sufferers in my time, both those who have died and those who have survived, I can tell you that positive thinking really can make all the difference to those going through this. I write countless stories about those with cancer who refuse to let it get them down, who throw themselves into fundraising and who often beat the disease. Not saying these are related, but it certainly gives the patient a new focus and drive rather than just worrying about being ill.After the No Make-Up Selfie craze flooded Facebook, Twitter and Instagram feeds just weeks ago thanks to a teenage mum from Stoke, we have seen yet another incredible use of social media thanks to Stephen Sutton. The teenager used Facebook and Twitter to spread word of his bucket list and to eventually raise £3.6million, which has been referred to as a credit to humanity. I can’t help but agree. In a world where Facebook and Twitter seem to be mainly used as ways of showing off, putting people down, or worse, trolling others, it is refreshing to see social media used to do good and unite a nation. The whole point of social media was to bring people closer together but with all the news reports on disgusting uses of the sites cropping up in recent years, it seems that more often than not they are being used negatively. Finally, we are seeing a new craze of using social media to help others and to make a difference.

The amazing thing about social media is that it is so easy, whereas before if you wanted to help charities you had to organise events, donate money or volunteer, now you are contributing just by sharing photos and messages. By sharing links to fundraising pages, you are already raising awareness and spreading the word. Online donation pages also make it so much easier to help, to donate to individual causes, challenges and to the larger charities. I’m just fascinated by how the No Make-Up Selfie spread like wildfire and the message of Stephen’s death is yet another incredible example – the Facebook announcement was shared more than 120,000 times within an hour of its publication.

Perhaps now more than ever it is important to take a good long look at the way we use social media and to make a concerted effort to be more responsible and to use it in the right way. I’d love to see a world where those using it to be nasty, to be perverted or to put others in danger just didn’t exist, but sadly I think where there is the technology there will always be these individuals. What I can hope for, is that the majority of people will continue to, or will start, using social media to really make a difference by raising huge amounts for charity by spreading these campaigns after being inspired by the work of Stephen Sutton. A far better use of our time than paying any attention to the Neknomination craze!

Click here if you would like to donate to Stephen’s campaign for the Teenage Cancer Trust.

Happy half-Birthday to AbsolutelyLucy!

Life has just been so crazy lately that I almost missed the six-month anniversary of my blog! I couldn’t let such a milestone go by without posting about it because in just six months I have gone from complete newbie to a full-fledged blogger and I couldn’t be happier about it.

My first post was published at the start of September 2013 – just a short piece to ease myself in, little did I know that it would lead to me posting four or five times each week and increasing both my daily and monthly views by nine times over the course of six months. I was soon addicted to blogging and couldn’t resist posting several times a week on a whole variety of topics including theatre, food, travel, literature, live music, festivals, university, relationships and countless other topics.

Reaction and joining the blogging community

I’m happy to say that I have had nothing but fantastic reactions to my posts, with regular insightful and thought-provoking comments being left by readers and plenty of discussion on Twitter. I’ve become a part of the blogging community by taking part in regular #lblogger and #fblchat Twitter chats, giving me the help and support I need to make decisions about my blog. I now have several fabulous blogger friends who I regularly chat with, despite them living across the country and internationally – people I would never have met or become friends with if it wasn’t for my blog.

Social media

I’ve learnt all about using social media to my advantage and as a tool to make friends and connections with the right people. I’ve more than doubled my Twitter following, created a Facebook page for my blog which also has over 130 followers and boosted my Tumblr following to more than 400! I’m so happy with these figures and it means that word is spreading about my writing. It has also given me the opportunity to be contacted directly by those I have blogged about, such as the guys at RAM Records, a member of Basement Jaxx, singer Ry X, the cast of From Here To Eternity, so that they can thank me personally for my words.

Awards

One thing I am absolutely thrilled to pieces about is the fact that within six months I have been awarded not just one, but three awards! One award I was actually nominated for twice in the same week! The first was the Versatile Blogger Award and this nomination came from a blogger who I had been avidly reading since starting out myself. The second nomination – The Lighthouse Award was for bringing light to a dark world. It came at a particularly dark time in my life from a blogger I had never met or spoken to before, and this really helped to show me that what I was doing was worthwhile. The Liebster Award is one that again, by bloggers I had never met or spoken to before, I was nominated for out of the blue – this time twice in one week! All three were such lovely recognition and all came from fantastic bloggers, which made me even prouder that they had thought of me when passing the torch.

Further writing

As a result of all this, and of my other work at This Festival Feeling, I have been asked to write two profiles – one about my course and distance learning journalism and another about what I have been up to since graduating. I have also been interviewed as editor of This Festival Feeling about the effect of social media on the festival experience. All of this extra writing has given me a great chance to further expose my blog to new readers which is only a good thing!

Following

Now I’m not one to look at figures as a mark of success and I definitely prefer a couple of followers who comment regularly and get involved with my posts, to hundreds of views. But, it is incredibly gratifying to know quite how many people are viewing my blog each day, and to see how much this figure has grown over recent months. I’m incredibly grateful to the people who do comment and get involved, but also to the wonderful people who have shared my blog with their friends. I’m so pleased that I started Absolutely Lucy because it really has become such a big part of my life, as have those who read it.

Future

So here’s to the next six months, let’s hope they are as productive! I am really excited for the future of Absolutely Lucy because the success of the last six months has really helped to open doors for me in terms of branching out to cover new topics, working with other bloggers and with businesses. But as ever, I’m still keeping my feet firmly on the ground and will be blogging about the things that inspire, interest and irritate me. If you have any requests or any suggestions for Absolutely Lucy, topics to cover or shows to review – please do leave me a comment below.

 

 

In your 20’s and don’t know which way to turn?

I read this article and it just seemed so completely ridiculous that I just had to share it with you. Written by Madeleine Dodd for the Huffington Post, it was entitled – Are you having a mid-twenties crisis?

Just the title was enough to make me laugh. It describes the “under publicised beast” that is the mid-twenties crisis, less obvious that the well-known mid-life crisis but describes those who are suffering as panicking when they realise they are too old to win the X Factor and then making huge changes in their lives such as quitting their job, ending a relationship, doing a Masters or going travelling. Dodd links these choices to three big differences between our generation and the last:

1.We know too much about what everyone else is doing thanks to social media
2.We’re the first generation to be less wild than our parents who lived during Woodstock times
3.We know our real value and it comes in at under 20 grand a year

What an incredibly negative and disillusioned woman. Such a shame to have such a jaundiced view of the world we live in at such a young age. Fair enough, times are tough and employment-wise we do have it a lot worse that previous generations, we are constantly aware of everyone around us and what they are up to, and perhaps some of us are having less fun – but perhaps this is more to do with what some people do with themselves. As a bit of a social media nutter (comes with being a blogger, doesn’t it?) I am on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, WordPress and Tumblr every day and am constantly seeing updates of what other people are doing and where they are in their lives. To be honest, my Facebook is packed full of three types of people – the ones who had kids/got married young, the ones who are still at university or are on gap years/travelling and the ones who have moved on to work, whether it is something they love or not. The only ones to be jealous of there are those travelling! Fair enough, if you haven’t got the job you want it can be hard to see how amazing some other people’s lives are, but chuck a bucket of salt over that and you might see a glimmer of reality when the ones with amazing jobs are having problems at home, work hideously long hours, actually get treated like crap in the office or their relationship broke up because the job moved them away. There is two sides to every story – Facebook sees the best side (or sometimes the very worst side) but there is always more to the tale.

As for point two, I think someone needs to get out more. Being wild is not about having money from said job or going off and taking copious amounts of illegal substances or dancing in fields naked. It’s about finding your passion and your love and blowing off some steam by giving into it completely every now and again. For me, it is going to see live music including DJs or heading to festivals. And I think if people really knew what a night out was like with me, they would realise this generation are wild enough, in fact if anyone tried walking around Boomtown Fair 2013, they would realise what wild really is!

Finally, we all know our worth and it comes in at under £20,000 a year? Okay, I understand it is very demoralising to come out of university and be forced to work in a job that you don’t like or that you think you are better than. I understand that I have been very lucky in securing such a good job and training to accompany it, but a lot of work also went into securing that. People really need to stop moaning about the recession and employment market, there are countless jobs out there that don’t have people to fill them because others are being too picky about what they want to do.

I have never been under the impression that I would walk out of university and into a job in journalism – I studied English and didn’t have my NCTJ – and I didn’t. I was unemployed for six months but in the two years before me finding my current job, I had done copious amounts of work experience where I impressed by getting front pages in my first week, I had filled in for the company when they were short staffed and contributed a weekly column – all my own organising and forcefulness but it worked in the long run.

Much as I love my job, I have realised that perhaps straight journalism is not for me and perhaps I would prefer online/broadcast or magazine work instead – most of all I would like to try different things but in the meantime I am making sure I am fully trained so that I have the journalism qualification for the future. After realising this, I managed to work it so that I was managing the website and entertainment section of the newspaper to help broaden my experience. I also started volunteering to write for a festival review website for free in order to gain more experience. I have since been made editor which is great experience and will look fantastic on my CV.

Knowing your value is not about how much you are earning – god knows that some of the most valuable people out there are the volunteers and those at the bottom of the heap who work endless hours to perfect things so others at the top can take the credit. It is more about making the most of your talents – by going beyond the call of duty both at your own job by making yourself invaluable, and at extra-curricular activities such as blogging/writing/volunteering/work experience that could benefit you in the long run by giving you extra experience. Sure you might not walk into a producer job at 23, but you’ll have a wealth of skills and although you might be working in a job you hate (back in retail after university is a killer) but you’ll be doing something outside of this that you love and that could lead to bigger things in the long run.

Put simply, the world has changed since our parents’ day and that may not be a good thing in every way, but it isn’t all bad. There are plenty of opportunities for those who are just starting out in their industries – just look at the countless people who have started up their own companies. They have been able to do so because the lack of jobs in their desired area has been lacking forcing them to create positions, and the low interest rates have given them the capital needed. Win-win. And the use of social media has only helped to develop this by offering free marketing and advertising of products to customers.

This is me at my graduation, full of hope and excitement for what would come next career-wise. I left university without a job lined-up but I wasn’t afraid of what was to come. I used the time off between university and starting work as time to relax after my hard work towards exams and to research jobs and journalism training. It helped me decide to start a distance-learning course instead of spending the huge amount of money on in-house courses, which worked in my favour because another journalist left the paper suddenly and they called on me instantly. I was clearly within their minds after all my hard work and it paid off. Patience is everything and a negative attitude helps no-one.

And since when was quitting your job, going travelling or breaking up with a long-term boyfriend seen as flighty or as signs of a mid-twenties crisis? Surely your twenties is the perfect time to start afresh, you have no real commitments and nothing to tie you down. It is a common time to break up couples if their careers or travel fantasies pull them in different directions, it’s the time to find new love and fall head-over-hells for the wrong people. It’s also the perfect opportunity to try out as many different types of work as possible to gain experience and use jobs as a chance to travel, move away and gain independence. As for going travelling, when you’ve just spent nearly 20 years in education and firmly under your parents’ wing, a taste of freedom at university can give you the desire to see the world and get out there. To experience it all for yourself, and with difficulties finding the right job, why not work  in retail, save some dollar and head out to Thailand to find yourself?

What do you think about life in your twenties? Are you having a bit of a crisis, or do you feel like you’re got it together?

Follow me on Instagram?

Follow me on Instagram

Lords and ladies of WordPress – just another way of following my everyday life and goings on outside of AbsolutelyLucy. My Instagram account is regularly updated with pics from my day-to-day life, anything that entertains me and anything else that comes my way. As I have mentioned before, I am a bit of an Instagram addict, although I resist a lot more now, I still love it.

For those on Twitter, why not follow me @LucyRuthnum for regular updates about what I am up to.